Caleb vs. The Swine Flu, The Final Conflict
Friday, May 15, 2009 at 8:37AM
San Diego State University: Where your child isn't learning a damn thing.So I managed to escape from San Diego, and I am pitching the concept as a Kurt Russel vehicle. However, my departure was not without incident, as the woman sitting next to me on the plane was sick, nauseous and threatening to vomit throughout the flight as a result of "stomach issues." I remained unscathed.
(Cue nostalgic Alt Rock.)
I learned a lot in San Diego...
I learned that homeless people work harder at panhandling when there's more competition, and there's a lot more competition in San Diego.
I learned that "San Diego" does not mean "Whale's Vagina" as Will Ferrell postulated in Anchor Man, but rather that it is an ancient, Native American term meaning "repository of unreasonably attractive people."
But most of all, I learned that San Diego isn't "almost Mexico" as my doctor described it, but rather that Mexico is "not even close to Canada."
I'll see you all back in the beautiful, swine-free cities of Minneapolis and Saint Paul.
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